Shattered Heart

Everyone is one phone call away from falling to their knees and the universe crashing down upon their head. No matter if it is a parent, sibling, endearing friend, or a beloved pet in my case sooner or later, all humans will suffer a devastating loss in their respective life's. Whenever that treasured soul is lost forever, all we can do is pray for a glimmer of color in an dismally painted world.

For the longest time it felt as if I was immune to pain and the agony associated with the death of a loved one. The most personal death til Erin was my grandmother whom passed away 7 years and that was heart wrenching as she was my best friend and biggest supporter in life. Nana was as close to sainthood as any human being to ever walk this earth and her passing ripped my heart out. I still recall not wanting to leave the funeral home viewing area and funeral home representatives asking me to leave because they're closing for the evening. Given the opportunity to sleep on the floor next to Nana's casket, I would have done it as a few hours isn't enough when your loved one is being buried six feet under.

The lost of Erin in my life is in another stratosphere compared to any other death. It's more personal as we spent so much time together and the accumulated memories are so vast. Erin was always at my side as I accomplished many milestones in my life and was ever present when I needed a hug or a dose of fur companionship. Her passing cuts deep as we are entrusted with the welfare and safety of our animal friends and to be powerless to prevent the death is a tough pill to swallow. Humans know death is inevitable and around the corner, thus for us it's part of the deal. I wonder as Erin gazed into my eyes and I held her paws if she knew the end was at hand, wish I had the answers. Hope she knows I did everything in my power and means to give her the remarkable life, few other dogs experience. Would have sacrificed my life to ensure her survival but I know she wouldn't have wanted to trudge on without me, so it's now up to me to carry the burden.


Thoughts of you during this holiday season!! RIP Erin!!!