MEME Award

Tag–I’m it. Mari,  the talenetd author of the blog http://mariscamera.blogspot.com/ has tagged me with a MEME. I am to answer a few questions about myself then pass the MEME on to other bloggers I enjoy. It’s a fun, getting to know you, assignment.

Here goes:

1. If you could go back in time to relive one moment, what would it be?

I'd love to relive the day I brought Erin into my life. Every intimate detail would be cherished and recorded for memories sake, that day has impacted my life more than any other in this world.

2. If you could go back in time and change one thing, what would it be?

 

To spend more time with my departed loved ones especially Nana whom I miss greatly. Time elapses so quickly and it can never be recovered, so many opportunities missed :(

 

3. What movie or TV character do you think you resemble most in personality?

 

George on Senfeld, the neurotic everyday next door neighbor

 

 

4. Which TV or movie character would you like to be?

Forrest Gump. What an incredible life he led, we should all hope for that much excitement, friendship, and love.

 

 

 

5. If you could push one person in the whole world off a cliff and get away with it, who would it be?

 

Due to my religious beliefs it is doubtful I could shove another human being off a cliff. Murder is not in my genetic makeup and nothing I've really considered.

 

6. Name one habit you want to change in yourself.

 

My capacity to carry grudges if I feel insulted, wronged, or slighted. There is no amount of time too short to dislike someone but I'm working on the issue as I've offered an olive branch today :)

 

 

7. Describe yourself in one word.

 

Sensitive

 

 

8. Describe the person who named you in this MEME in one word.

 

Thoughtful, talented and content.

 

 

9. Why do you blog? Answer in one sentence.

To share the amazing life of Erin while healing my broken heart

 

 

10. Name at least 3 people or more to send this MEME, and then inform them.

These three blogs inspire me to become a better person and really stir the emotions for vaious reasons. All are worthy of visiting over and over, please check them out!!

 

Sulekkha at Memoirs

Rimly at Journey

 

Jessica at AscendingTheHills

 

 

Thank you to Mari for tagging me with a MEME!! As a fellow dog-lover I feel a special kinship with you and I love your beautiful photos, helpful tips, and lovely animals, please keep sharing them.

 

 

Daddy's Girl

Erin splashed color onto my black and white canvas, in reflection it seems that life was sorely lacking something until she entered the scene and changed life for the better. Inseparable from the beginning, she was the reason the sun rose and set thus my reason for living for the past 12 years. While she loved people and other animals without limits, it was clear she was "Daddy's Girl" by her devotion and unconditional love. Often in the company of others, she socialized as needed only to return to my side for a seemingly obligatory check-in where I nudged her back into the fray but repeatedly she made an appearance to remind me of her proximity. Contentment and happiness were the order of the day when together and to minimize any anxiety I certainly tried to limit our time apart, all decisions were made in the best interest of Erin and I wouldn't want it any other way.

It was hard being separated from her, so many times at work I wondered what she was doing; I could picture her napping on the couch, lying in the backyard watching the world go by, or searching the house for the treats hidden during our daily scavenger hunt. Everyday before departing for work, a handful of doggie treats were scattered about the house for her to locate, usually they were placed upon the furniture, randomly thrown in rooms or partially hidden under a magazine, etc. The idea was to stimulate her mind, provide some entertainment, and to satisfy her ravenous appetite, rarely did she not find the edible treasures scattered about. It usually took a few minutes at most to locate the goodies scattered about and this came after the required frosty paw or greenie.

Returning from work was arguably the best part of my day as Erin would dash from the backyard to greet me at the door. As the vehicle turned into the driveway she headed towards the doggie door at the rear of the house and as the kitchen door was swung open I'd be greeted with that broad smile and a tail that moved in a blinding blur. Plopping down on the floor she fell into my arms like two lost friends and it really seemed like it was a lifetime of being apart, it was a special time that we both cherished. Next came "Pillow and cover", a phrase that indicated she was supposed to leap into bed for some belly rubbing, cuddling, and a round of horseplay; somehow the bed was not only for sleeping but a site for bonding and tomfoolery

Erin was always loyal to a fault, waiting patiently in the backyard for me to appear at the appointed time regardless of the situation or weather condition. While I admired her loyalty to me, it was frustrating to come home and find her soaking wet in a thunderstorm, completely doused and shivering like a leaf on a tree. Staring through the chain link fence, possessed of a look that wondered where the heck I'd been, she remained in place despite the inclement weather. "Get your butt inside" meant track mud and water to your usual position at the entranceway thus promptly she darted inside oblivious of her physical condition and appearance. A towel engulfed her except for the head and I pulled her close in an attempt to warm her up using my body heat meanwhile she looked lovingly upon me with the most soulful eyes imaginable. It's impossible to remain mad at a creature who is willing to sacrifice their physical well-being and comfort due to their unwavering loyalty.

Erin was "Daddy's Girl" to the very end and even in the face of adversity, her devotion to me was clearly evident. While her body was failing and death moments away, the spirit and determination that everyone admired was still shining through as she attempted to stand and comfort me, it's tearful as I recall that moment but it demonstrates her unbridled devotion and no other act defines our love better. RIP Erin!! Daddy will never forget you!!

Healing Through Writing

People write for various reasons, possess different motivation for putting pen to paper and the reasons vary as much as the words tumbling from the respective authors head. For me this blog began as a means to soothe the pain after the passing of Erin and my desire to shed some light on what was an incredible journey. One can resort to alcohol, drugs or any other means to cope with the loss of a loved one but none of those options were very appealing to me on a long-term basis and also I felt none of these served my recently departed in a honorable manner.

 I considered it my obligation to write anything and everything about Erin as a means to connect with her on an entirely different level. The more words about her life and our years together that could be scribbled down the better, nothing were too personal or sacred to be jotted down and that included the final 36 hours of her life. That period was the first piece written as it was fresh in my mind and while it was very painful to recount, I wanted to document every intimate detail for futures sake so tearfully I poured the words onto the pages. Reading about Erin's final scene in life is very difficult thus the leather journal lies in a desk drawer where it could sit dormant for the remainder of my years but it served a great purpose as being the first step on the path to healing.

Soon after came an idea of a children's picture book featuring Erin and several spiral notebooks littered with scrap pieces of papers are the foundation of that vision. Pages of revision after revision, numerous sketches and notes of constructive criticism are proof of the labor of love but as of late that goal has been sidetracked as the blog has received the majority of my attention. To see my fur-angel depicted in print for children would be the ultimate tribute and hopefully one day that dream will become a reality. It's really therapeutic to envision Erin on the over-sized pages of kiddie books all around the globe and one of my aims in life is to make that vision a reality.

During the writing process of the children's book came the idea of a blog about Erin's life and while I knew absolutely nothing about the process of how a blog works, there was no denying one would be set up in tribute of her. The result has been beyond my wildest imagination as sharing stories from her past has been so soothing while received feedback has been nothing but positive in every aspect. It's been my pleasure and honor to reveal glimmers into her life and the years we shared together, she led an extraordinary life in many ways and her story is too special to not be spread via the internet and other means. So many people have responded favorably to tales of Erin while opening up about their own life struggles so there's been a great sense of healing for all involved.

Pouring my heart out about Erin is gratifying in so many ways, sharing her stories has allowed me to release some of the emotional pain I'm saddled with and the healing benefits has exceeded my wildest imagination. "Erin is Love" has been a worthwhile endeavor and I'm so thankful for the opportunity to touch hearts around the globe with my words. Looking back, I've come a long way in terms of both my writing skills and internal angst, seems I'm a totally different person than the one who started this blog many months ago. The writing process has made the journey to my final destination much easier and I'm so grateful for this opportunity to share her story. Thank you to all who have embraced Erin's tale and continue to support me along the path to healing!!!!


"The reason one writes isn't the fact he wants to say something. He writes because he has something to say." ~ F. Scott Fitzgerald

Erin's Positive Impact

Employment and residing in Kosovo was an eye opening experience for both of us. It became quite apparent upon arrival that our life's would not be status quo especially for Erin in an environment where dogs of the friendly ilk are rare and canines are considered feral mongrels for the most part. While life among the locals was occasionally stressful, the bond of the soldiers with my companion was anything but that. The work environment inside the hangar was typical of any other aviation scene with a buzz of maintenance activity being performed upon a various of helicopters but these soldiers are forbidden to bring along family members or pets thus they get very homesick and that's where my girl came in.

Erin's appeal was evident the very first time I took her on base with me as the weekend shift gate guards made such a fuss over her, they petted and stroked her flowing coat while examining my car for contraband. Later on, soldiers pointed and wandered over to say "hello" after spotting us walking around, they inquired as to how I was able to possess a dog in Kosovo and I quickly learned that Erin was one of a kind; no one else was permitted to have their household pet in the region. Tethering her to a post outside the laundry facility, rec center, or the cappuccino bar was akin to tying an impala to a stake amid a pride of lions. Whenever I exited the respective building she would usually have a few soldiers huddled around her spoiling her rotten, she'd look up to me with a huge grin that screamed "this is the good life."

Occasionally I spoke to soldiers in the hangar about their family, friends, and beloved pets and eventually a discussion of Erin would arise therefore they were informed that she lived with me in a downtown apartment. They wanted to know about her life in Kosovo so I talked about life there, her incredible journey across Western Europe, and showed them pics stored on my cell phone. After several months of living there I approached my leadman with the idea of bringing Erin to work with me in order to boost the morale of soldiers in the hangar. My boss had no objection as her reputation for being obedient and friendly was well established but I would have to ask permission from the commanding officer before we proceeded any further.

The idea was pitched to the officer where I ensured him that she would be absolutely no trouble at all, that quality and quantity of work wouldn't suffer and any harm to Erin would be my responsibility, he agreed that it was a good idea and the rest is history. A pack stuffed with food, treats, water bowl and other necessities was brought along as we entered the hangar the following day. On a leash she was but only for a few minutes as my co-workers convinced me to release her to the delight of both the soldiers and civilians, nothing like having an outgoing dog around to enliven the place. It was great being able to have Erin nearby as I worked and she loved all of the attention dished upon her, it was such a positive experience for both of us. The entire hangar was one large playground with many rooms, offices, and work areas to explore, no doubt she wondered why I hadn't thought about this sooner.

The soldiers all doted on her and never tired of calling Erin's name, sometimes it was evident that feelings were hurt when she favored one over another. Many wanted her in their offices so she would venture off with them for some bonding or an opportunity to rest for awhile but before long I could hear the distance jingling of her tags and knew she ws headed my way. "There's Daddy" they would shout to reassure her as she raced toward me for some comforting then Erin would wander off with someone else. This generally continued all day with her appearing at my side then the next moment was lying at the feet of another getting those ears massaged, it was a good life for her and the soldiers certainly appreciated it.

After a few months I stopped bringing Erin to work much to the chagrine of everyone as I feared she would eventually get injured in the hustle and bustle but what an amazing situation it was for all involved. It was a rare opportunity for her and for the many soldiers on that Balkan tour, it's a memory which I'll surely never forget as she touched the hearts of so many U.S. servicemembers. I'm so proud of her as she made a positive difference in the life's of others. RIP Erin!!


“Nobody can fully understand the meaning of love unless he’s owned a dog. A dog can show you more honest affection with a flick of his tail than a man can gather through a lifetime of handshakes.” ~Gene Hill

Dogs dig beach Scene

Running along the sandy beach avoiding the crashing waves that pound the shoreline she darts in and out of the ebbing surf. Erin does her best to sidestep any wave of substantial height in a game of chicken with nature. It's a game which she wins for the most part then out of nowhere a wall of water sneaks in to surprise her, the wave splashes down abruptly or quickly rushes up to eye level and she retreats to the safety of dry land. Looking up to me for reassurance, she is reminded it's okay and casually she meanders back into the cool salt water where any level that exceeds the bottom of her belly is too high for her liking. She loved the feel of water on her body especially her belly but was never too keen on the idea of swimming.

Arriving at the beach, she bounds from the back seat and gives me that look that says "hurry up, what's taking so long?" The backpack is slung over my shoulder, it contains all the essentials for one human and one canine to survive a day exploring the beach, inside the well used bag is food, water, doggie snacks, sunscreen, reading materials, and anything else that comes to mind before we hit the road. Multiple of squirrels greet Erin as we casually stroll toward the beach and she would gladly skip the beach to spend time chasing the varmints from one palm tree to another. Urging her toward the dog-friendly beach she proceeds at a leisurely pace, sniffing and exploring the new scents that cross her path or peak her interest.

Several miles of sandy expanse are hers to investigate as she sees fit, together we walk in the shallow surf with an occasional wandering into deeper water for some excitement. Off leash she wanders slightly ahead of me never putting too much distance between us, she glances back to ensure I'm with her and she continues the journey. Millions and millions of shells litter our route along with sand dollars and horseshoe crabs grounded at the shore line, little attention is paid to these creatures by Erin who strolled along without a care in the world. As the water receded, pockets of collected water or doggie wading pools made the perfect spot for her to relax, she would plop down with the biggest grin affixed to her face and there was little doubt happiness filled her heart.

Off-leash she remained for the majority of time unless we came across swarming masses of frolicking sun lovers and to avoid an unpleasant situation, I restrained her for appearances sake. Many folks would point or stroll over to say hello to Erin, who was always available for some human-canine socializing. An occasional dog would cross our path, be seen playing in the surf, or spotted lounging under an umbrella, it was so nice to be on such a dog-friendly beach. The north side of the beach was isolated except for a few brave souls, this section seemed like heaven on earth. Such a beautiful serene place where a dog could run all day, roll in the loose sand, play chase with other dogs, nap when tired and Erin was the anointed queen of this paradise. Running and playing upon the beach and surf was as good as it got for her and the ever present smile made it so worthwhile to me.

Hours of romping on the beach led to one exhausted dog, there was only so much energy Erin could expend before shelter was sought out. Upended trees due to beach erosion provided shade from the scorching sun and the perfect spot for her to rest, consume water and food, and take a nap if desired. Many days were spent in doggie paradise, she always had an amazing time and the beach never failed to deliver maximum fun for her. It was one of those magical places for her to explore, a location where she connected with nature and a place that  cemented our bond. She always fell fast asleep on the way home with a broad smile as exhaustion overtook her and that told me the hour plus drive to the beach was well worth it for what it meant to Erin. Memories of us walking in the surf will last a lifetime and our beach days rank as amongst our finest together. RIP Erin!!